Intro to the passage; Matthew 18:21-35:
Jesus is asked a question - "How many times must we forgive someone?"
In typical fashion, Jesus answers the question with a story.
Note: - ancient rabbis taught that you must forgive someone 3 times
 - 10,000 talents = 15 years wages
 - 100 denarii = 100 days wages

Please read the passage. 

I’d like to talk to you this morning about forgiveness. I’ve entitled this message, "Forgive and be Free!" because I believe that that’s the point of Jesus’ story. Forgiveness is the path of freedom. Unforgiveness is a jail cell.

Now, Jesus makes this point in the strongest of terms. Once upon a time there was a king who wished to settle up his accounts, the loans & debts of his servants. One servant owed him an enormous amount --15 years wages. Now, there was no way that the servant could pay the king back that amount. But mercifully, the king has pity on him and forgives him the debt. 

This is a very theological point that Jesus is making here. He’s saying that we owe a debt to God that we can never pay back. A holy, perfect, and loving God has created us and blessed us with every spiritual blessing, and yet we as human beings -- collectively and individually -- have squandered God’s blessings, have lived time & time again by less than the best we know. We could never make a payment to God to make up for all the sins of humanity and all the sins of our lives -- all the times we missed the mark & fell short of God’s will for our lives.
None of us have the capital or moral reserves to make such a payment. We are at the mercy of the King of Kings. And of course, the Good News is, a payment has been made in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Our sins have been covered, blotted out, wiped away, removed from the books. We have been forgiven all our debts by the King who had mercy upon us. 

And so Jesus is saying, "I want that to sink in. "I want my mercy and grace to touch the very depths of your souls. "So that those of you who know that your debts are forgiven might be debt-forgivers of others. "In fact, when you pray say, ‘Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.’" "Because if my amazing grace has truly touched your lives then you won’t be able to keep it to yourself -- you’ll be sharing that grace with others, you’ll be a debt forgiver. "If not, you’ll be like the servant who was forgiven a debt of 15 years wages and went out and wouldn’t forgive someone who owed him 100 days wages." 

When we don’t forgive others, we look as silly as that ungrateful servant. So forgiveness is not an optional course for students of the Jesus. It’s not an elective, it’s a required course. And the church has reminded us of this time & time again, but the church hasn’t always helped us out a great deal it seems to me, because there’s still a lot of confusion today about what forgiveness really is. 

Let me start by saying what forgiveness is NOT. Forgiveness is not excusing a wrong.  What do we usually say when someone apologizes to us?  "That’s all right."

As if forgiveness is saying, "It’s OK what you did. That’s all right. Don’t worry about it.
"As a matter of fact, you could do it again any time." True forgiveness is really saying, "It’s NOT OK what you did, but I forgive you. Apology accepted." You forgive a wrong, not just something you can explain. What I think we should say when someone apologizes to us is, "I accept your apology."  In fact, that’s exactly what we’re requesting when we say, "Please accept my apology." 

Ex. If I accidentally step on your foot and break your big toe, you’re not going to say to me, "That’s all right. It’s all right what you did." 

So, forgiveness is not excusing or explaining away a wrong. It’s acknowledging a wrong from your perspective and forgiving it anyway. 

Forgiveness does not mean forgetting something. There’s that strange phrase, "Forgive & forget" as if forgiveness & moving on meant totally removing something from your data base. Just because you can’t forget an episode, doesn’t mean you haven’t forgiven someone for it. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. It’s remembering and yet forgiving.  

Forgiveness is also not to be confused with reconciliation. 

Ex. When someone says, "Pastor, how often must I forgive my abusive husband?" She isn’t really asking, "How many times must I forgive him?" She’s really asking, "How many times must I put up with this?" (and the answer is, not once. It’s never a loving thing to allow someone to abuse you.) She’s confusing forgiveness with tolerance and reconciliation. Forgiveness and reconciliation are two different things. 

Let’s talk about what forgiveness is. Fortunately there is someone named Lewis Smedes to help us. Smedes is a professor of Christian ethics at Fuller Theological Seminary in Pasadena, California. No one has written more thoroughly, eloquently, and powerfully about forgiveness. This past summer we had a book club on his book, The Art of Forgiving. At the end of the book he has a section entitled, "Just remember this."

We printed most of this section in your programs this morning.
Here’s the bulletin insert entitled, "Just Remember This"

 1. We do our forgiving alone inside our hearts and minds; what happens to the   people we forgive depends on them.
 2. The first person to benefit from forgiving is the one who does it.
M. Scott Peck says: "The reason to forgive is for your own sake, for our own   health. It is needed for healing, because if we hold onto our anger, we stop   growing and our souls begin to shrivel."
 3. Forgiving happens in three stages: We rediscover the humanity of the person   who wronged us, we surrender our right to get even, and we wish that person   well. (that’s how we know we’ve truly forgiven someone, when we truly wish them well)
 4. Forgiving is a journey; the deeper the wound, the longer the journey.
 5. Forgiving does not require us to reunite with the person who broke our trust.
 6. We do not forgive because we are supposed to; we forgive when we are ready   to be healed.
 7. Waiting for someone to repent before we forgive is to surrender our future to the  person who wronged   us.
 8. Forgiving someone who breaks a trust does not mean that we give him his job   back.
 9. Forgiving is the only way to be fair to ourselves.
10. Forgivers are not doormats; to forgive a person is not a signal that we are willing  to put up with what he does.
11. Forgiving is essential; talking about it is optional.
12. When we forgive,
we set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner we set   free . . . is us.
13. When we forgive we walk in stride with the forgiving God. 
 

Closing Illustration:  Corrie Ten Boom, a holocaust survivor who sheltered Jews during the war, was speaking at a church one night.  After the service a former prison guard went to greet her and shake her hand. "Corrie, I was one of the guards in your wing, but now I’m a brother in the Lord." Corrie froze, and she could not shake his hand. This haunted her and she prayed for many weeks about it, asking God to take away all the bitterness and hatred she had inside. Then one day the former guard was in the audience again. And this time when he came through the line, she did extend her hand. And as she did, she felt freedom. She felt she had set herself free. She realized that forgiveness did not mean excusing what he had done, or explaining it away or forgetting it completely. Instead, forgiveness meant freeing herself--letting go of all the negative energy and being alive to God & to grace and contentment here in the present moment.

If you’re holding on to something this morning, ask a gracious God to set you free.
That is the miracle of forgiveness.